Stress- its a killer. I mean it takes me bouncing between Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde all the time. Sometimes circumstantial, sometimes self inflicted but always a nuisance. Sometimes stress likes to hibernate making you feel like you are on top of it again only to hit you back to back to back like a machine gun of frustration and lies- kicking me while down. Stress don’t play fair.
I’m not sure what others need during stress. For me, my minor stress can be cured with one small homemade brownie and a long hug. But the lingering stress, oh the lingering stress! The type that can’t go away cause it lives in the season of life you are. The beautiful season of life that has you keeping, protecting, boogie pickin, feeding, loving, squeezin, wiping, zipping, covering, praying they go to sleep babies. This stress you brought on yourself cause you think it is so valuable and worth every single moment but simultaneously makes you crazy. This type of stress cannot be handled by chocolate. This type, for me, can only be remedied by community.
Now- I do love the food giving of community. Sweet people dropping off mounds of pasta always with dessert and extras for the next day. Those people are angels that should get their own holiday.
But the ones that really help me, are the ones who don’t count me out. They keep inviting me and asking me to do things for THEM. These people get my help with their kids or ask me for advice. They still give me grace and allow me to bow out if I need to but they haven’t forgotten me as their friend. Their friend that desperately wants to be involved with them, who wants to come to birthday parties and meet for coffee. It looks different these days. If my friends need me I’m there- but it may take me a little longer to grab snacks and wrangle the girls into the car. If someone needs a meal I’m coming- it just might be partially store bought except for dessert. But nevertheless, they have kept me a part of the community.
To me- too much space is claustrophobic. It makes me get in my head, my world gets really small as does my perspective. My issues take over and my thankfulness suffers. I get irritated, resentful and lonely. It’s not a good place for me to be. I’m not overwhelmingly perfect and selfless, I just need to know that I am contributing to the lives around me. Yes my family is worthy enough to invest in and should not be looked over. But I can’t wait until the kids are grown and it is convenient again to serve because then I’m afraid I will have forgotten how and lost myself in the waiting. And they need to see me investing in others and not just them. If I close myself off from giving, I close them off as well. And I can’t do that. For all our sakes.
Bit of a rant but wanted to put it out there. Those of us with babies are here! Use us! Not just for child care either (please, Lord, not just for childcare)! We want to be in the community. Don’t outcast us! Still bring us food, obviously ;). But call on us in times of need. Trust us to determine if we can help (and it’s true sometimes we should say no for our families), and give us grace when we can’t multiple times. But don’t forget us. Please. We want back in he game. Even if it’s just to wear the jersey or be he water girl for a while (which I actually was in high school and they are needed too).
Put me in coach. I’m ready to play!
Water girl for life,